“Hey, what’s up?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. Not really, but you don’t care, you’re just being polite.”

“I don’t know you, but how about you, like, give me some money, let me drive your car around. You know? I’ll act real nice to your face, call you sometimes. C’mon, it’ll be fun. You just need to let your guard down and trust me. So that I can take that trust, roll it into a tight, greenish-blue ball and throw it in the air. I’ll make you think that I’m gonna drop it, but I won’t. Until one day I actually will drop it. The ball will pop. Splatter all over the floor (which will hopefully be hardwood, because if it is carpet it will be hard to clean up the mess). I’ll step on the mess, kick it, the dog will eat some. Then I’ll clean it up. You know? It’ll be fun. C’mon, let’s try it!”

“Yeah! Definitely. That sounds cool. You know what? While I’m at it, how about I just give you my soul. Wait, no. I can’t just give you my soul. I’ll sell it to you for a dollar. I need to buy lunch tomorrow.”

“Sure. That sounds fair.”

“Great! Well, I’ll see you after school. Meet me at my car and I’ll sell you my soul, allow you to drive my car, take my money, and hopefully, if I’m lucky, you can completely break my faith in the world, too!”

“Okay, I’ll see you at your car after school. Oh, wait! Can you bring me tanning today? Thanks!”