When we got the call we all were devastated. She hadn't been doing well for a few months, but no one wanted it to be like this. She had to fight all her life, and then she was hit with this. How is that fair? The following days felt unreal. Going through her things, adapting to life without her, and the funeral. The funeral was the worst, as it was my first one ever. I walked through the big white doors with my head hung low. As soon as my tiny foot hit the emerald green carpet I felt uneasy. The bright lights and white walls made everything around me look so bright, but the energy inside was dark and gloomy. Once inside, I stood back as all the adults I knew stood next to what looked like a box, but deep down, I knew inside that box held one of my favorite people in the whole world.

My Aunt Lisa had down syndrome. She had a mindset of a younger child so we would watch movies together; mostly Winnie the Pooh. She would even let me draw “mazes” through the words of her books. She always had a big smile on her face and never had any complaints. If you asked her how her day, dinner, or anything was she would respond by putting up the okay symbol with her hand; three fingers straight up while her pointer and thumb touched. She had short fluffy brown hair that sat on top of her head, and a beautiful set of brown eyes to match. Her face was a little scrunched, and she had a cute button nose which her round glasses sat upon. She was short, about the height I am now. She enjoyed going golfing, and reading, and would attend church every weekend with my great grandma, grandpa, my siblings, and me. We would always spend time together and I wish we could again.

When she was 47 she passed away from Leukemia. I was devastated because it was the first time someone that close to me died and it was hard for me to handle. After she passed, my great-grandma gave me her big brown jewelry box. Her snowman necklace was always my favorite. It has a gold chain that connects to a golden top hat that sits right on top of the small cloudy white snowman. He has 3 black buttons, 2 big glossy black eyes, and a huge smile. I love the necklace and wear it every Christmas in memory of her. I visit her every year on her birthday and the day she died so she knows we are always thinking about her. I don't like to wear her necklace unless it is Christman because I don’t want to lose or break it. I really wanted something of her that I could always have with me. In August 2020, I decided I wanted to get a tattoo dedicated to her. The tattoo is located on my left forearm. It's Winnie the Pooh, our favorite movie to watch together, holding onto the dangling string of a heart-shaped balloon with Piglet holding onto his legs. In the middle of the giant heart balloon is the date she died, January 22nd, 2012. 

People often assume that I regret getting my tattoo because I was young when I got it, but I know I will never regret getting it because she was a part of me and I chose to carry her with me. My family deemed me too young to understand when she passed, but I was 6 and had feelings as well and mine were looked over. This tattoo has been a dream of mine since I was little and I'm happy I was able to fulfill it. She will always be a piece of me, and I'll carry her wherever I go.