My life has been interesting but I wouldn't call it special as some would say. I was born in Santa Cruz but raised in Watsonville. For example, some people unfortunately suffer accidents which mark them forever, they break an arm or a leg, have operations or accidents. I know that some people had it better and worse than others, and I'm not here to tell you a sad story about myself. The decisions I have made are mine and I need to live with them. The decisions I make today do have more thought behind them and will not be changed at all. Because I'm not looking for your pity, I just want you to give me a little of your time and I'll tell you a little about myself and how I think I could have done some things better.

My parents raised me in many different places and in different ways, in apartments, houses and even today in the house where my mother grew up. They both gave me their own values, like my mother the values ​​of honesty and love. She taught me by spending time with me and doing chores around the house. My father taught me how to value work and responsibility. He took me with him to work since I was a child so he could appreciate everything he has. This is the opposite of what my dad taught me, he taught me to value work and be proud of what you do. And for that reason I will never be ashamed of what my dad does for work.

In my house it has always been a bit chaotic, with my dad never having a schedule and my mom wanting to do things, things are rarely compromised in my house. I remember as a child that I always asked my mom when my dad was going to come home from work, and what she made for lunch when I came back from school. And he always answered that he didn't know when he would return, the thing is that my dad leaves very early to get to the job site on time. Then he comes back very late, doesn't leave until the job or an entire section of the job is done. He works as an electrician for electricity and internet, while my mistress stays at home or works until she gets angry and leaves. As Dr. Lamas says, Barbie is very popular, although this is true, my owner only bought colored dolls for my little sister. He did that to teach my brother that we should be proud of our roots.

 The thing with my owner is that before and after having me she worked with Wells Fargo, then she stopped working to take care of me and years later had my little sister. He also worked in an insurance office and in cabrillo, but now he is back at Wells Fargo in Marina, but he never stays in one place for long before leaving for another. He stays with us to help me with school and pick up and always pushes me to do the best I could and not be lazy or lazy. I owe a lot to her, and I wouldn't be in the position I am in without her. This love that Maria showed for Chucho, that is the love that my mistress has shown me. And the love that my parents want me to show to others in my life.

When I was young, my father took me with him to work almost every weekend. He started taking me when I was 10 years old, he taught me how to connect cables and install lights in houses. I recently learned how to prepare and install cables designed for building and camera data. In this way he instilled in me the values ​​of work and responsibility, as a result I valued all the work it takes to achieve things. Also now with almost 7 years of experience I have decided to try to get my low voltage license. Although my dad was born in the states, many when we go to work are surprised that he is doing the job. It's like they don't believe that we are capable of doing the job and even though we are from the country, they don't consider us Americans like them.

In addition to working with my father, I also consider the cadet program as a job. As with my father, he teaches me responsibility and the need for discipline and routine in one's life. Furthermore, now with the Corporal promotion, I have the same responsibility as the cadets themselves. Everything bad and good that they do is reflected on me, and the way they participate in the events is up to me. The uniform that I wear is what gives me a purpose. That is the same thing that can be said by the teacher in the story, his report is what gives it status and purpose. Without him, I and he are nobody, others would not know who we were or what we could be.

Although I haven't lived for long I do have some experience with school and education. I don't remember much about my two years in preschool, except that I became good friends with Uriel, who I still talk to today. What I do remember very well are my 9 years at Alianza school. I went to that school from kindergarten to eighth grade. I remember that the first day I went to Alianza for kindergarten I cried, because I didn't want to go to a new place or that my mother would leave me alone. The kindergarten experience was something very different because it was the first time I had learned Spanish again since childhood. As Casares said, we as Mexicans in the United States live both cultures and learn both languages. Going to a school that only spoke English for preschool forgot that part of me. But when I came to Alianza it retaught me and reintroduced me to the other part of my identity.

Afterwards, the time I spent in primary school was not something special, I made some new friends, some left school, others moved to another city. What did impact me a lot was the way my third and fifth grade teachers taught me Spanish. My third grade teacher was nicknamed Cruz-Padilla and in fifth grade, Guzman. Teacher Cruz-Padilla was always teaching the class with a lot of passion and patience to the children. I remember that every Friday he made time to go with each child and make sure his students learned their accents and the new words. But compared to my fifth grade teacher, Teacher Guzman, there is no comparison. She taught me compassion for others and helped me discover my love for history and the facts of humanity. It is because of her that I try to have a positive view on everyone and try to have compassion with everyone I meet. And I think that's what the poem Desiderata means in that quote.

After all that, high school was only memorable because of what happened in my eighth year. I spent it online due to Covid. Many said that that year was difficult because it was not easy to learn from a screen. I remember that I have always needed to learn in person, face to face. 8th grade was a very different experience, it was hard to focus and I feel like I didn't learn what they were teaching me. This experience changed my perspective on school. It taught me that it wasn't a thing I liked or needed, most of the time I was teaching myself. So there I started to put less effort into school. That's how I felt during the pandemic except I wasn't in a room, I was stuck in front of a screen. The experience was something that opened my eyes to how miserable school is.

High school so far has been an interesting experience, I didn't think I would go beyond what I was comfortable with. Plus I didn't think I would make friends and the things I have done, like joining the cadets. And especially not being a corporal in the cadets, it's a responsibility I never thought I had. But in addition to all that, high school opened my eyes to the fact that I am actually living my parents' dream and not mine. They didn't finish school and always wanted to finish, and my father wanted to be an engineer. Now they want me to go to school to study engineering. This false dream I have has become part of my identity, but now it has started to disappear. Although this false dream is disappearing, I have felt that my identity has begun to deteriorate.

My earliest memory is when my mom left me with my aunt to take care of me for the day. I remember my mother was dressed in a very light gray business suit. He told me that he loved me and that he would return when he got off work, and there he left me in the driveway for my aunt to pick me up. After that I don't remember much, except that I watched SpongeBob during the day and ate a plate of spaghetti. With these memories it gives me purpose to continue with what I want and who I am. I don't know the reason because on the other hand when that memory comes to mind and it makes me very curious because it comes to mind.

It is when these memories and thoughts come to my mind that I feel that I am making the wrong decision in going to the navy, that if I leave I would leave everything that my parents have done for me and that they would forget about me. But at the same time I feel like if I go to college I'm going to waste my parents' money because I don't think I have what it takes to go to college. They will be my dreams that will get me out of this infinite cycle of not fulfilling them. The memories of my family and the knowledge of my family's incomplete dreams will give me the purpose to be successful. This is an example of what happens with people who do not have the motivation to become something they already are. I don't want to stay like this, that's because I use these dreams to motivate me in what I want to do.

College for me has always been something so close but so out of reach that it feels like a lucid dream. I have seen my cousins ​​go to university and graduate, but the more I see it, I recognize that what they do is not for me. It's not that I'm too lazy to go, it's that this system that California has and especially the system in the government universities is not something that I agree with. For example, Camila's sister graduated from Davis and in her work she does not even use the certificate with which she graduated. I work with a child and her second job is in an office, while she was studying to be a lawyer. Then my other cousin graduated with something completely different and decided to be a teacher of a different subject. This comparison that the author Borges makes demonstrates the difference that one can have between themselves. Since I have a very big difference compared to my cousins, we do not live in harmony.

After all that, my cousins ​​are without their demotions and are working on something they like. They knew what they wanted to do and they didn't need to go to school to spend their money to find out. An example of this is my cousin who didn't go to school and is now a music teacher and loves what he does. He teaches music specifically guitar to low-income children and at the YMCA and really likes what he does. This is the reference to how two very different beings can live in harmony. This can be seen in the very different lives between my cousins ​​and me.

On top of all that, I think the university system is a waste of money and especially in California it is a form of indoctrination. It makes college students think they are better or even smarter than everyone else, when in reality they are the same or worse. Also the curriculum or the things they are teaching are very liberal and with things that I do not agree with. In this study it was shown that everyone with a degree from a university thought that because they have more intelligence than the person from the navy, who actually had the highest 3 of the group. This is the effect that I want to notice for myself.