Every person will go through situations that change them forever. Decisions that either destroy or discover their future. Mind sets that either break or make them. My life would be a perfect example.

My parents were going through custody arrangements and they both wanted me to live with them full time. I've always been a "daddy's girl", and I looked up to him so much; but, I was too naïve to know the truth behind his actions. One of my favorite quotes read "It's not hard to make decisions if you know what your values are" (Roy E. Disney). At the time, I was around thirteen years old. I wasn't quite sure what my values and morals were. Promises were made on both sides of the equilibrium. My dad would promise me everything a girl like myself could want: horses, four wheelers, snowmobiles and clothes. Anything. Though my mom’s promises of shelter, safety and unconditional love were more sincere, my dad’s promises sounded better and better the more they spilled out of his mouth.

Before and during the custody war, I would go to my dad's house on weekends. He moved around a lot. One month we're living in a trashy trailer in Lake City, the next we're living in his friend’s garage. After moving around multiple times a year, he finally got a good job in Cadillac. He got a loan to buy a house not far from his work. We were doing really good for a few years. He did some remodeling, built a bigger garage, got a new dog and things were really looking up. But, it seems like every good thing comes to an end sooner or later. He lost his job. Things started going downhill again. He would rent out the spare bedroom to anyone who had the money. He'd even allow strangers stay in my room when I wasn't there. I wondered who layed in my bed prior to me. After outbreaks of violence and numerous broken promises, I started to realize some of the things that were happening around me. My dad would be passed out on the couch with some sort of alcohol in his hand. People would come knocking on our door demanding money from my dad. Money he did not have. When this happened, he'd tell me to go play at my friend’s house a couple houses down. Before I left one time, I saw an awkward looking man hand my dad an orange prescription pill bottle. Prescription medication and alcohol became his number one priority. He sold his promises he made to please his body and mind for the night. I stopped going there for a couple months but I missed my dad. I missed being that little girl that was too young to understand because only then he was my dad and not a monster. By my sophomore year I realized that he could no longer be my role model. I didn't want to be like him. I didn't want to hurt people like he emotionally hurt me. The only person in this world I could thank for helping me realize that was my mom.

 I lived and still live with with my mom during the week. She keeps me on my toes; always there to make sure I'm making the best choices. My mom has structure, discipline, and a schedule. My grades stay above average and my respect meter stays full. My mom never failed on any of her promises. She married my step dad and they bought a house about six years ago. A house I know I'll be able to come back to everyday after school, without an eviction notice stuck to the door. She promised me safety and shelter and that is what she gave me. Not only that, but she loves me, her children are her number one priority. She made me into the person I am today: honor student, college goals and responsible. My mom has helped me realize just what my standards and values are in life.

    I still visit my dad most weekends which most would say it isn't a safe environment for a teenage girl, but I forgave my dad for making me grow up so fast. If I wouldn't have witnessed what I did, I could have easily followed in his footsteps. I've seen the best of both worlds; the corrupt and the upright.