“Cut to the basket” “move your feet” “get on your defender” is all I heard our coach say. I memorized those three things and are still engraved in my mind from my first basketball game.  That day we were playing against Milford. I was in third grade and it was my first basketball game. I remember my heart pounded like a drum and my stomach was considering returning what I had just eaten. I was getting ready, I was throwing on my number zero Mariemont Jersey and my blue shorts. Then I slid on my black Nike socks and put on my blue and green Kyrie 4’s. 

I felt that day like I wasn’t ready, like if I had never gone to basketball practice. I thought I was going to explode. I felt like I had forgotten how to dribble. I tried to contradict myself by remembering it was only a rec basketball game and not the NBA Finals. But still, I felt anxious. I could feel myself shaking and I was as pale as a cloud. I was finished getting ready, putting my Gatorade and basketball in my bag. Then pops told me it was time to go, and to this day I remember cruising through the house watching the sky. My palms were like a sea of water and I was shaking like I was in a blizzard. My pops noticed me shaking and pale and asked me if I was nervous. I responded 

“ I am very nervous,” I said

 He told me about the first time he played baseball in a tournament and how his worry caused him to make mistakes and I couldn’t commit that error. I tried to breathe and calm down but it was too late because we were there at Milford high school which to this day I’m not sure why it was at their high school. Immediately I felt overwhelmed by all but the top things. I had no idea where the fancy basketball courts were. I was alone because my pops was parking the car and I couldn’t be late for warm-ups . So I had to ask someone and I got the directions. My worry just deepened every time I thought about playing.

When I arrived at the courts I was overwhelmed by the massiveness of the courts and the fancy wood design on the floor. I went back to being pale. I felt like I was having a panic attack then I found Mr. Anderson and felt relieved. But then I turned around and saw the Milford roster and to this day I deny to believe they were third graders. I felt a gust of anxiety and a wave of fear. But for the first time, I was ok with not starting in the game. But deep inside I felt worried in my guts. I knew eventually I would have to guard and play against those high schoolers. Immediately without surprise, we were down by thirteen points in the first half when we were being demolished.That game we were being challenged. Luckily I told the coach how I felt and he understood but it didn’t completely save me. 

In the second half, starters were getting tired and we only had two subs and I was one of them. Eventually, the coach told me I had to go in and it was true everyone was getting tired. Until it was time, the coach told me I had to go to the scorer's table and wait. He told me to remember to isolate the defender . Then the whistle blew and I was in the game. I felt like I forgot how to play basketball. I was reckless. There were turnovers, fouls, it was not a good game. But then I remembered what pops told me, I straightened up, gave the underneath of my shoes a clean sweep, and put my head in the game. Coach exclaimed, 

“Cut to the basket” “move your feet” “get on your defender.” 

I stole the ball, ran to the basket and scored my first basketball point. Then they passed it to me. I shot the mid-range and made it. I felt like the first person to climb Mount Everest. We ended up losing the game but I learned something valuable: we can't let our anxiety ruin something important. To this day not only is “cut to the basket” “move your feet” “get on your defender.” engraved on my mind but what my pops told me also in memory today.