1. It is time to go to school. Before getting out of the car make sure your parents understand that you need to be picked up at 2:15. Tell them 3-5 times so they won’t forget.

2. After school--40 minutes after--realize they have forgotten to pick you up, find a phone and call them... and call them... and call them for 10 minutes straight. When they don’t pick up any of your phone calls, question their love for you and whether or not they even remember that you were born.

3. Wait for another hour. It is now 4:00. Finally decide that you must take this into your own hands. You must walk home. I mean, home is only, what, a few miles away. Realize that it is -10 degree’s outside and you have forgotten to bring a jacket. You probably should have listened to your dad as he exclaimed that very morning, “What if you have to walk home and you don’t have a jacket?” Hey Dad, clever, very clever. You can’t help but wonder whether or not this is just a carefully executed plot. Really should have listened.

4. Start walking. Now the plan was nice, until you went outside. Try folding your arms, it doesn’t help considering you are wearing a mini t-shirt. As the icy wind cuts through your body try not to cry. Think of the pioneers. If that doesn’t work than heat up the situation by trying to think of all the things you are going to say when you get home. Oh what you will say... the anger, frustration, and hate!

5. Arrive home, not any worse off than when you started, minus the fact that you no longer can feel any part of your body. Walk in side and let loose. Tell them about what you were going through the past two hours. When you are met with “Dear, we didn’t know ‘Lone Peak High School’ could possible be a call from you, it is only the high school you have been at ALL DAY [emphasis added]” and “We didn’t even realize that you weren’t home” let it bug you, a lot. Start going off on how you need someone you can rely on and by the way, you need new clothes.

6. Clothes. Now we are at clothes. How did you get here? It doesn’t matter, it is valid, you are mad remember? When you exclaim your dissatisfaction with you current jeans and it is met with a “Yeah! Your jeans are too skinny, you can see right through them” from your little brother, take this as a major insult and exclaim, “THAT IS WHY I NEED NEW ONES!”

7. Point made. Dang you are good. Well, that is what you think. Before you can take in your glory, turn and find your brother looking at you with one heck of a “Dude-I-am-brilliant” grin on his face. Try to maintain an angry disposition as he says, “I have an idea.” (Great an idea, this should be good.) “Get on with it!” you say. So he does. “I have an idea. How ‘bout you walk home EVERY day! That way, we don’t have to worry about you AND your pants will fit!”

8. Stand in under shock. Was that a fat joke? It doesn’t matter now, now THAT was funny. Burst out in laughter. Laugh until you cry. Laugh because all of a sudden everything leading up to this point really is hysterical. You forgot a jacket? Laugh. It was -10 degrees? Laugh. No one picked up the phone? Laugh. Soon your sides will start to hurt. Laugh. Laugh because you can’t stop, because you realize that life is good, that life is okay, and most importantly that life is funny.