You ignore me for days. A long distance relationship is bad enough. But one like this. You don't stand up to me. You appreciated me so much. I think to myself that I have to be strong. I will not ring you. I will wait until you ring me. I always end up ringing you. I just can't live without you for too long. The waiting hours feel miserable. I don't know what to do. I'm bored. Usually I check the weather forecast, the news, my emails. You still haven't rang. At 9 I call you. You don't answer the first time but the second. You don't say much.

Me: so how are you?
You: fine
Me: so what have you been doing all day?
You: nothing
Me: I love you and I missed you
You: Hmmmm
Me: do you want to tell me anything? Any news?
You: ugh. No. Stop annoying me
Me: I'm only trying to care about you. I'm showing that I'm interested in you
You hang up on me.
I feel dissapointed. Hurt. But content at the same time. I heard your voice at least. This day didn't end without you. I feel ashamed. How desperate must one be to accept to be treated this way. It isn't right. Yet, I always pray for the good days on which you care about me. You seem interested and happy. You tell me that you love me.

I can't tell you how I feel. You won't listen. You would hang up on me if I would tell you about my problems and the pain. You'd tell me that all I want is pitty. You aren't coming over at Christmas although you could. We won't see eachother for 8 months. This will not work. I'm scared of everything. Of the hurt and pain. My favourite quote is:

“The worst feeling ever is not knowing whether to give up or wait.”

I'm too good to you, I see the person you have the potential to be. I understand you too much, I know you. I can't be angry at you. But at some point you will just realize that you've done enough for someone and that it's not you that has lost the fight for love, but the other person that cannot appreciate you . They will never know what they missed out on. A song describes this so perfectly and truly:

"One day baby we'll be old and think of all the stories we could've told."

So if you are going through something similiar then just do it. Tell the other person it's over, don't just ignore them. Tell them why you've made your decision, have a bath, get a haircut, paint your nails and most importantly block the person on social media. You don't want to be reminded too much about the other person. It takes a while to get over it but go out with your friends and get to know new people. Soon you will realize that it was the best decision you have ever made as so many new doors will open up for you. You get the chance to meet people that can treat you so much better. It is so important to know when to end something. But always most importantly listen to your heart!