Sitting in the cafeteria waiting for my friends to return, my brain started to wander off to the most important day of my life. I remember it all clearly, as if it were yesterday. Sandy’s yelling into the microphone so loudly, my eardrums began to beep. “Are you ready ladies? We are going to..” and the drum roll begins, “.. London and Paris!” I looked at my mom and smiled a little too hard. The silliest thoughts ran across my mind while Sandy revealed the grand total of the trip. Maybe I’ll be able to meet all of my British role models! Maybe I’ll finally meet Harry Styles,-What? I’m a sixteen year old fangirl, what did you expect?

But the day dream left as quick as it started. My white worn down G-shock ticked, taking me back into reality, letting me know that it is now noon in New York City. In six hours, I will be on my way to London- finally! My heart beats fast whenever I think of traveling to Europe. This is what we have been waiting for since November, for my whole life. The smile on my face isn’t wearing off and no one is going to take it away. Music now sounds better and the world looks happier. I am ready to relax-which is well deserved, junior year is provoking my under eye circles to come out. I am ready to make amazing new memories. I am so ready to leave home and although that sounds so cold hearted, it is true.

I step out of the tube, on the first day, and feel as if I have been in the city of London before. This intensity, of me feeling as if I experienced this before, caught me in a great awe. How could somewhere so far away from home feel exactly like home?

As we walk towards the musical theater right outside of London, I realize my guard is down. Not in a stupid way though- I am still aware of my surroundings but I am not paranoid, it is as if I am walking around back home in Astoria any other day. As if I was passing by familiar faces, familiar sights, sounds and smells. The comforting aura of London seeps from everyone’s pores, the smiles and welcoming glances lived everywhere. I am not scared at the slightest. I am extremely calm and collected, as if I was an English resident my whole life.

“That makes sense,” my mother said upon my return, “You loved London ever since you were a child. Your infatuation is odd actually, you never even visited before.” I tell her stories how easy it was for me to navigate through England’s highly functional train system, and how amazed I am.

Sometimes I don’t feel as if I belong here in New York. I understand that it is everyones dream to live in New York City, but it is my dream to live where I feel truly happy and I felt that specific happiness once I arrived in London. It is an unexplainable happiness, it was something that consumed the negativity in me. Something that taught me that genuine happiness comes within- no matter how cliche that sounds, it is one hundred percent true.

Now that I am back home, I can’t stop thinking about how happy I was across the world. How easy it was for me to fit in, how happy I was surrounded by British accents, how at peace I felt in that specific ambiance. Several years can pass, memories can gather, but I still see myself going back to London. Because whoever gets tired of London, is tired of life.