Picking my feet up, I run. As my black door comes into my vision, I speed up only to be knocked off of my feet. Feeling no pain, I stand up and begin to open the door. The door opens from the opposite side of me, causing me to fall to the cold ground. I look up to see Ayvanna, my best friend, staring down at the floor where I lay, in shock.

“Ayva? You can see me?!” I scream, excited. No response comes from her mouth but the slight nod of her head tells me the answer to the question nobody could seem to hear. Tears fall from her baggy dark brown eyes as she steps to the side of me, walking towards my father. She clutches a light blue gift bag in her hand, handing it to my father as I rush to her side, tears in my eyes along with hers. 

“She would have wanted you to have this, James.” My best friend says blankly. My dad uncovers his deep blue eyes and looks at Ayva, a single tear resting right above his lip. He opens the bag and pulls out my dark red locket, holding it up to where he can see the picture that is planted inside. The picture was me, him, and mom, before he started drinking and ruining his life, back when there was a smile always on his face. A small painful smile forms on his face and for the first time in 10 years, I see how deep down he is hurting, deep down where even the alcohol couldn’t touch. I look inside the blue bag as he pulls out a box, a box filled with pictures of my best memories.

“Thank you, Ayva.” My father says, painfully. I think even Ayva notices the pain in his voice, the pain he always tried to hide, the pain he always tried to get rid of, the pain not even my mom could see. 

“Of course, Mr. Lee. Sarah was and still is my best friend, I would go to the end of the galaxy to get her back if I could, sir.” Ayva says, slightly turning her body to where she can face me. “I have to get going though, me and Matt have a test to study for.” Ayva says, looking to the floor, afraid to meet my father’s eye.

“Come by and visit sometime, we love having you.” The girl that sat next to my father said, joyfully.

 Ayva rolled her eyes as she nodded her head and began to walk out the door, slamming it shut once we both are standing outside. 

“Sarah, what the hell is going on?! You are dead!” Sarah whispers, afraid to draw attention from my neighbors. 

“Ayva, I don’t know. I woke up this morning, in a dark place. Once I closed my eyes and opened them, I was in my bed.” I tell Ayva. Ayva looked worse than she ever has, worse than her first heartbreak, worse than when she got her first F, worse than ever. Her eyes were bloodshot red, her hair in a tangled mess, and dark circles forming her eyes.

“Ayva, I love you but you look like sh*t.” I laugh, hoping she does too, who knows when I will hear her laugh again. She laughs and pulls me towards her, hugging me tightly. You would figure that ghosts can’t be touched and can walk through walls but that isn’t how it was with me. 

“We have to figure this out, Sarah.” Ayva says, unlocking her car doors. She opens the passenger side door, grabbing a small piece of trash, pointing at me to get in. Once I take a seat, she closes the door behind me, walking to the drivers side and getting in. When she gets in, she looks both sad and terrified, looking to her feet.

“Sarah, I don’t know where you have been or why you are here now but I haven’t been the same without you here. Your death killed me. Everybody at school walks up to me and asks me how I am doing as if they didn’t make fun of me before you died. I think I am going insane, which would explain why I can see and hear a ghost.” Ayva says, sadly, starting the car.

Once we arrive at her house she parks her car in the long narrow driveway, opening her door and stepping out, taking a moment to breathe. Her house hasn’t changed since last year. A two story off white house with black framed clear windows and a porch on each floor. One porch which leads to the living room where me and Ayva used to spend countless hours watching scary movies with her brother and one porch which leads to Ayva’s room where we would talk about boys and play truth or dare until the sun went down.

Before I get a chance to open my door, Ayva does it for me, pretending as if to grab something from the floor of her car.

“Get out.” Ayva whispers, kicking me out of my thoughts. Stepping out of the car, the house door opens and Lisa, Ayva’s mom, looks at her questionably. I watch her eyes closely, wondering if she can see me, she can’t. Lisa looks right past me to Ayva’s car door.

“Why is that car door open?” Lisa asks, smiling weirdly.

“I had to grab my phone.” Ayva smiles, waving her phone for her mom to see as she walks up the concrete steps leading to her house doors.

“How was it seeing James?” Lisa asks Ayva, tears falling from her eyes. I knew how Lisa felt about me, I was her second daughter without ever being truly hers. Ayva never seemed to be jealous of our relationship, we both loved Lisa, we both would have loved to be sisters. Ayva had been my best friend since preschool, it started with a blue broken crayon. 

“It was fine, he seemed different though. He looked at me weird and he seemed to care more now then he did when she died. He looked hurt, genuinely hurt.” Ayva tells Lisa, assuming Ayva told her mom how he acted towards me, how he would hit me and tell me he wishes I was never born. 

“I’m sorry you have to deal with this, you’re only 16 and you lost your best friend. I see the pain in your eyes every single day, I promise it will get better.” Lisa tells Ayva, hugging her tightly. 

“Awww, you love me.” I whisper in Ayva’s ear, tears falling from her eyes, she nods her head. 

Picking my feet up, I walk to go find him. Ayva’s brother, Matthew, sat in his room with his door slightly opened. I step inside carefully as the door creaks, his attention going from his phone to the now opened door. I smile at him, remembering the kiss from the night before my crash, I felt tension with him I never have before. His eyes were puffy just like Ayva’s and seeing him like that broke me. Once he sat his phone down, I saw what he was looking at. A picture of me, Ayva, and him, swimming in the lake that was closest to their campgrounds, where we would go every summer. I begin to walk out before I realize the drop of Matt’s mouth, staring directly at me. I turn around to see if he is looking at anything behind me but no, the only thing that is behind me is an unopened calendar hung on the wall. He whispers my name softly.

“Sarah…” He says, tears falling from his eyes. 

“You can see me?!” I scream, jumping on top of him, wrapping my arms around his neck. He shakes his head and runs his hands through his hair, shaking away the thought of me, thankfully he can’t manage to do so. He closes his eyes, hoping he isn’t dreaming, but once he opens them I am still there, in his arms. 

“Why are you here?” He asks me, terrified of me.

“I don’t know. Me and Ayva are tryin-” I start.

“Ayva can see you too?” He interrupts me, looking confused.

“Yep. Only you and Ayva, so far at least.” I respond.

“Not even your dad?” He asks me.

“Nope, not even him.” I respond, beginning to cry.

“Sarah, the night before your… Nevermind.” Matt begins, regretting he said anything.

“The night before my crash we kissed, I know. What about it?” I ask, hoping he doesn’t regret it and feels the same as I do.

“I love yo-” Matt begins. I interrupt him by placing my mouth against his, kissing him gently. A few seconds later I pull away from him, smiling.

“I love you too.” I say. Moments later, the world looks a little brighter, light shining onto me. I close my eyes, hoping when I open them I am still there. Once I open them, I am.

“Sarah, what the hell is going on?” Lisa asks from the doorway.

“You can see me?!” I ask her, hopeful. Ayva looks at me, shocked. I take my hands off of his shoulders and stand up, facing Lisa.

“Yes, I can see you! I just saw you kissing my son.” Lisa says, in shock.

“Oh.” I say, realizing she has no recollection of my death. Ayva’s face tells me she remembers but it also tells me I am in deep shit with her.

Days later, nobody but Ayva and Matt can remember my death. I still don’t know how it happened but there is one thing I know, I was meant to kiss Matt.