There once was a period of my life when I began to lose myself, I thought I had nothing and nobody that shaped me as a person anymore. I was 14 years old and for the last 10 years of my life gymnastics was my passion. My whole world revolved around it. I was in the gym for at least 24 hours a week, 4 hours a day practicing. I absolutely loved it. My best friends were the ones I had at the gym. I had friends at school, but I didn't have the same connection and tight-knit relationship as I had with my gym friends. My gym friends saw my sweat, blood, and tears and I would see there's. We shared a bond like no one else. I couldn't imagine a world without gymnastics.

I began to have pain in my hips around December of 2016 and as a gymnast, we are expected to deal with the pain. We were in the middle of meet season and I felt like I had a lot to lose. Having surgery before on my knee, I knew what serious pain was like and my hip pain began to feel serious. The pain got worse and worst every day to the point where I would come home from practice in tears. My mom couldn't take how miserable I was and called to schedule a doctor's appointment behind my back. I went in and they took some x-rays. The doctor told me my bone structure looked good, so they didn’t know what was causing my severe pain. They decided it was best to get an MRI so they could get a better view of what was going on. A couple of days later I went in for an MRI. For two weeks I waited in suspense for the results. Little did I know, I was waiting so anxiously for heartbreaking news.

The doctor called one evening with news that changed my life. “Unfortunately I don’t have the best news for you and Evie. She has bilateral tears in both of her labrums. I’m so sorry,” the doctor said sympathetically to my dad as I was listening on speaker phone. At first, I was unsure of what that meant, but within seconds I googled, “Hip Labrum Tear”  and within 5 minutes, I was educated enough to understand the severity. Tears started to roll uncontrollably down my face. The most common treatment was surgery. I was devastated. I went back to the doctors a week later and they told me that in rare cases with enough physical therapy I could get back to normal, but since the labrum does not repair itself surgery in a better option. Two surgeries? Two recoveries? How am I ever going to do gymnastics again?, I asked myself. I knew deep down that I wasn't going to be able to go back to gymnastics, but I didn't want to believe it.

As I understood more and more about the labrum I learned that once it's torn and repaired, it becomes delicate and can easily be torn again. My doctor told me that he thought it would be best if I quit gymnastics. It became real at this point I began to fear that I was no longer going to be a gymnast anymore. Although it should have been an easy decision, It was by far the hardest decision I have ever made. I was so confused about what to do. This confusion soon turned into constant anxiety and depression. I was so sad and stressed out all the time, I didn't know what to do with myself. I stopped going to gymnastics for a while, which meant I stopped seeing my best friends every day. I hated it. Gymnastics was a huge part of who I was. My friends brought out the best in me and without those people and gymnastics in my life, I began to lose myself.

Through so many tears and hard conversations, I finally made that excruciatingly hard decision to quit. It's difficult for me to explain how hard it was for me to make this decision, but my physical health became more important to me and my parents were not going to let me suffer any longer. I thought I was going to lose all my best friends, be alone and have nothing.

Through this pain I was feeling, losing something that meant so much to me, I realized that quitting gymnastics showed me who my true friends were and uncovered passions I never knew I had. Stopping gymnastics caused me to see some of my friends a lot less, but it showed me that gymnastics wasn't the only thing keeping us close. It also freed up a lot of time in my life. I spent more time with my family and really felt their love and support of my decision. I came to realize that there was so much more to life than just gymnastics.

After my first surgery I went through a long recovery, but once I was completely recovered I started to get my life back on track. I thought my life was going to be over after quitting gymnastics, but now looking back, I believe it just started. Through the tough time, I went through I started to lose who I was as a person. In these dark days, I used my difficult situation to build up my strength and find the person I truly am and who I will always be. I believe that going through hardships only makes a person stronger.