How Do You Want To Die?







There is this website that asked " How do you wanna die ? "
Well... How ?
I was watching a movie , the girl has cancer etc.... may be you have heard of it, or saw it, SWEET NOVEMBER....
As expected, I was crying all along .. And there was this part, when , I just, I mean, The girl was saying, " You know, he asked me to marry him " So the guy said, well, he is not the first !
And you know what the girl said then ? She shook her head and said that" no ! But this is the first that I wanted to say yes ! "
Then , why didn't she, right ? Well, she couldn't. She knew he was gonna be hurting at the end, and she parted with him by saying that she needed to know that she was gonna be remembered as that, I mean, strong and you know, loving life. She said that if she knew that she was gonna be remembered like that she could face anything.

Why is life so unfair ?
None of them deserve this !
Both will be hurting. And I ... I know that was a movie, but its real, . Its too much real, only, the girls, the actors in real life, they dont get to do this, this thing, whatever you call it. The guys in real life, the ones who wish they could just go away from all and try to be remembered as the one they were before they had no control over their life.

Well, you must be wondering, what does it have to do with me answering how I wanna die.
It has everything, but nothing to do with it.

I WANNA DIE ........ SUDDEN.
A SUDDEN DEATH IS MOST WELCOMING TO ME .
Like, I wake up one day and I just feel dizzy and die.
Or i am crossing the road and just die as a car hit me.
Or anything like that which kill me sudden.

No, i am not saying that I am afraid of pain and that's why I wanna die sudden.

I don't want to live my life regretting or wishing I could live my life fullest and as I want.

You see in movies that a guy know he is gonna die soon and so he is doing all he wants to do, all he ever wanted to do with his life. But, you know what scares me ? That, one day, in the middle of this mission of living life before you die , you wake up one day finding yourself lying on hospital bed. pipes and needles on your body and you know, THIS IS IT. The end of my living life as I want.

Yes. I am scared of that.
See, Suppose, one day I come to know that I have cancer or something like that and I wont live long, and may be they give me certain dates, or months or years and also hopes . But I know that whatever hope there is, How long ? Not as I would live normally , right ?
So, I start living life to the fullest as watched in movies and read in books ?
Nah ! it wouldn't work !
How can I do everything I wanted to do in my whole life ?
How can someone finish that before a deadline ? When you don't know whether it might be next hour or next week or next month or even next year !

As it might not be, hell, it wont be coming as a surprise that I hate to die, I dont wannna die. well, who does ? Those stupids who takes their own life for stupid reasons. And those who does not have any more reason left to live for. And those, who are tired of living as a walking reminder of man's fragile nature and a walking drug-store .
Clearly , I don't. I don't wanna die.
Well, not unexpectedly . Not before living my life ! Not before I have even started living , not just existing. Not before I have loved, been loved, done the things I need to do, want to do, and LIVE.

I DON'T WANNA DIE BEFORE I HAVE EVER LIVED.
And if it so, if I die early, then I want it to be sudden, fuss free, not a burden, not a reminder of having little time left on my sand clock of life.
I hope my wish come true.








~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ wish dust











XOXOXOXOXOXO