Have you ever heard anyone complain about the way they look? They say their thighs are too big, they are too short, or too fat. A lot of times people make comparisons of their own body to someone elses. You may not think about it, but saying things like that stick in your head and can make you hate the way you look.

The body is an absolutely beautiful thing, the the world is only beginning to understand this. We see it everyday on television, in magazines, and even on the internet. The problem with this is that the world is only accepting a certain body type, and that is criminalizing other body types. Now, I’m not writing to be anti-skinny, because thats not at all what I believe. Just let that sink in for a moment though, that maybe how the world defines beautiful is not correct. Then what is? What defines beautiful? You do.

We have all heard the phrase “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.” many times and yet we never really think about it. We definitely do not apply it. We look at life in the mindset that beautiful is what we are always told it was in media, and we start to look at our own bodies and become unsatisfied.

Who is to say what beautiful is? No one can tell you exactly what beautiful looks like because beautiful is what you look like. Beautiful is how you feel about yourself. There isn’t one body type in the world or one set size you need to be to be beautiful. You are perfect the way you are and you should not need to be validated by a bar set by this ghost that honestly seems to be nonexistent.

I am using the term of ghost as a term for whatever people or media decided to set the bar for what is beautiful and what is not. I am doing this because it’s impossible to know what the main source it but we see everyday that this “ghost” is there. It’s the voice in your head that makes you look for flaws. It’s the AD on television that shows you how much weight a person lost using the latest diet pill.

So many people go through life absolutely hating their appearance because this “ghost” told them they were unattractive, and for what? There is never going to be a good reason to hate what you look like, or in general who you are. Yes, as people we will always have flaws, maybe it’s a freckle, or a mole. Why can’t that be beautiful? It is part of who you are and part of your individual appearance. There is nothing wrong with that.

When that ghost lets us lose our individuality, then we have lost our confidence and integrity. We stand in front of a mirror lying to ourselves saying we are ugly. We lose our confidence in who we are and what we look like. We can not afford to lose that.

In a day and age where we surround ourselves with media, it’s easy to lose sight of who you are. You’re individuality is in not only your personality but your appearance. When we lose that to the ghost, we lose our confidence and gain a self loathing. Never forget that the only person that can ever define beauty is you.