I would like
to find a job
where people would accept me on the spot-
give me money,
enjoy my presence.
I would like to take longbreaks
Sit in a café
Staring at the boy with the button-down blackshirt
and khaki shorts
who keeps disappearing behind the counter.

Iwould like
to sit with the melody of contemporary guitars in my head,
withmy fingers tapping my cup
while my thoughts run like waves,
and I am notafraid
of the Regents I just failed
of the ticket I received lastweek,
the sickening feeling of coming home to a dead house
where silencestrings us together as a family
but as people we are strangers.

I wouldlike to forget
that I don't tell and they don't ask
and what is a parent'sdefinition?
I'd like to bury these thoughts
Pave them over with a bettermemory
but for now I would like
to sit and stare
at the boy in thebutton-down black shirt
and khaki shorts.