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Not In A Good Way

January 18, 2012
By chloena_garrett GOLD, Colorado City, Texas
More by this author
chloena_garrett GOLD, Colorado City, Texas
19 articles 13 photos 180 comments

Favorite Quote:
At the touch of love, everyone becomes a poet.<br /> <br /> Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.<br /> <br /> A poem is never finished, only abandoned.<br /> <br /> Art is the only way to run away without leaving home.

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You take my breath away.
Not in a good way.
You literally suck the life
out of me and I can't breathe.
When I'm with you I'm at
a loss for words.
Not in a good way.
You make me feel so bad
about myself that I'm
too stunned to speak.
You give me butterflies.
Not in a good way.
I just get so nervous
worrying about saying
something wrong.
You make my body tremble.
Not in a good way.
I shake in fear of
your cruelty...
I can't be without you.
Not in a good way.
I hate our relationship,
but I'm scared of leaving you.
I love you but
I can't stand you.
When I'm with you,
I can't think straight.
Not in a good way.
Our relationship confuses me
and I don't know how to cope.
So I'll take the lashes
and the insults if it's
what I must do.
But one thing I
will never do,
is walk away.

© Cassie H., Carmi, IL

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This article has 11 comments.

XCBVIA GOLD said...
on Sep. 13 2013 at 8:45 pm
XCBVIA GOLD, Delaware, Ohio
14 articles 1 photo 28 comments

Favorite Quote:
NGU. Never give up.

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This is awesome. I think it really describes a abusive relationship and how people never want to walk away. I love the "not in  a good way" part and i totally agree with your other commenters on your use of "you take my breath away" that was awesome there! KEEP WRITING! You have a 5/5 from me
chloena_garrett GOLD said...
on Feb. 6 2012 at 8:44 am
chloena_garrett GOLD, Colorado City, Texas
19 articles 13 photos 180 comments

Favorite Quote:
At the touch of love, everyone becomes a poet.<br /> <br /> Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.<br /> <br /> A poem is never finished, only abandoned.<br /> <br /> Art is the only way to run away without leaving home.

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Thank you. sooo much. tht makes me smile.
chloena_garrett GOLD said...
on Feb. 6 2012 at 8:44 am
chloena_garrett GOLD, Colorado City, Texas
19 articles 13 photos 180 comments

Favorite Quote:
At the touch of love, everyone becomes a poet.<br /> <br /> Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.<br /> <br /> A poem is never finished, only abandoned.<br /> <br /> Art is the only way to run away without leaving home.

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I will. yay. thanks.
ossiecastro5 PLATINUM said...
on Feb. 5 2012 at 8:00 pm
ossiecastro5 PLATINUM, A Single Light In, New Jersey
39 articles 9 photos 68 comments

Favorite Quote:
I&#039;m not saying anything, I&#039;m just saying.

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Wow, this was very interesting. The phrase "you take my breath away" is usually for love and it's used in a different and creative way. Good job, this was great. I'm always a fan of good poetry.
butterfly123 said...
on Feb. 3 2012 at 11:00 am
butterfly123, Banglore, Other
0 articles 0 photos 408 comments
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hey ! i like the way the poem flows and the thought you have put in it. keep writing and pls check out my work too! 5/5 from me!
chloena_garrett GOLD said...
on Feb. 2 2012 at 10:23 pm
chloena_garrett GOLD, Colorado City, Texas
19 articles 13 photos 180 comments

Favorite Quote:
At the touch of love, everyone becomes a poet.<br /> <br /> Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.<br /> <br /> A poem is never finished, only abandoned.<br /> <br /> Art is the only way to run away without leaving home.

View profile
Thank you. I really like how detailed you describe the things I did right with this poem. I love getting critiqued on my work.
ethan_bane_hope GOLD said...
on Feb. 2 2012 at 10:16 pm
ethan_bane_hope GOLD, Willis, Texas
19 articles 0 photos 16 comments

Favorite Quote:
there is nothing to fear except fear itself

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i have to say first. i loved how you started it out with "you take my breath away, not in a good way." that is attention grabbing in itself. i like how you make it twist with that second line of "not in a good way" it made me really start to analyze while i read and i could even relate. you described it perfectly. 5 star!
chloena_garrett GOLD said...
on Feb. 2 2012 at 9:55 pm
chloena_garrett GOLD, Colorado City, Texas
19 articles 13 photos 180 comments

Favorite Quote:
At the touch of love, everyone becomes a poet.<br /> <br /> Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.<br /> <br /> A poem is never finished, only abandoned.<br /> <br /> Art is the only way to run away without leaving home.

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Thank you :D I really need more comments and ratings... lol.
EmmettHerculeLaFave SILVER said...
on Feb. 2 2012 at 9:54 pm
EmmettHerculeLaFave SILVER, Tucson, Arizona
8 articles 0 photos 70 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;We have it in our power to begin the world over again.&quot; -Thomas Paine

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Very relate-able, very emotional. Well done.
chloena_garrett GOLD said...
on Feb. 2 2012 at 9:53 pm
chloena_garrett GOLD, Colorado City, Texas
19 articles 13 photos 180 comments

Favorite Quote:
At the touch of love, everyone becomes a poet.<br /> <br /> Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.<br /> <br /> A poem is never finished, only abandoned.<br /> <br /> Art is the only way to run away without leaving home.

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Thanks :D yay i love when readers can relate.... although its bad that you can relate to this one and not any of the happier ones..
-Ash- SILVER said...
on Feb. 2 2012 at 9:51 pm
-Ash- SILVER, Redmond, Washington
7 articles 4 photos 49 comments

Favorite Quote:
She wants to die. She wants to disappear, to be remembered no more. She wants so terribly to be forgotten, all her mistakes, all her failures, everything. Her name to be wiped free from all record of existence. Because is it really existing when you&rsquo;ve got nothing to show for your life?

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sadly i can relate, but i really liked it! 5/5 :)