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To Hide From Myself
I hide my feelings
as I hide myself
under this
canopy
of my sorrows.
No one sees
my tears,
no one hears
my cries,
no one notices
my pain.
One girl's pain is
genuine and sorrowsome.
The other girl's
story can't stay
the same.
Then there's me-
hiding all the pain I feel.
People walk by,
not knowing I'm here.
Not knowqing I'm screaming
for help.
I hide under this canopy
with walls of thorns.
To hide how I feel.
To hide the pain I have suffered.
To hide from the hate.
To hide from the world.
To hide from my friends.
I stay strong for them.
I feel they need me more
than I need myself.
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I was at camp a year ago and we were all talking about something tragic in our lives. One girl was talking about her mother dying, the other about her step dad; whom she had told me she was glad he was gone because he was abusive but there she was crying because she wanted the same attention that the other girl got (I knew her well, she always did things like that). I was sitting there bottling up my emotions because my mother had died not long before I was twelve and it hurt sitting there listening to one girl lie for attention and the other crying due to pain so I left to hide and crying under a canopy late at night and while doing so I wrote this.