The feeling of dread
Swarming around in her stomach
Provides the only warning

Then the change in her voice
It becomes smaller
Quieter
Weaker
As the emotions start to build

Disappointment
Shows quite plainly
On his face
Later she would reflect
And wonder why that hit as hard as it did

The emotions are stronger now
Each one pulling her
Further into a downward spiral

Anger speaks first.
Ugh, what is wrong with you?
How could you forget so many things?

Frost begins to form.
Her fingertips start to turn white.

Then guilt creeps in.
I had so much free time.
It’s all wasted now.

Slowly it crawls
Up her right arm

A soft voice starts to whisper in her ear.
You’re a failure.
You failed.
And it’s all your fault.

The frost begins to form
A beautiful pattern of spirals
And snowflakes
On her pale grey skin

You’re horrible.
You failed.
It’s all your fault.

Beautiful
But deadly
As it hardens
Sparking a feeling of panic
Her eyes wide
Her body shaking

You’re worthless.
You’re horrible.
It’s all your fault.

She exhales as the ice makes its way up her neck
Air turning into mist turning into ice
Her breath freezes into icy shards
And falls around her

You’re a failure.
You failed.

The falling shards
Slashing her left wrist
The red
Standing out so strongly
In contrast to the frost
Coating her arms
Wrapping her in its chilly embrace

The shock
Is enough
A moment of clarity
The voices pause
As physical feelings
Of coldness and pain
Start to take over

The voices
Begin to shout
Louder and louder and louder
As emotional and physical feelings
Collide

A silent scream
Of panic and fear
As the frost reaches her face
Cuts through the chaos in her mind
Shocking the system and pulling her away

She’s watching herself
Standing there
Frozen in time
The frost still coating
Her arms and neck
Blood staining her arm

Her face shows no pain
No anguish
No exhaustion
She is calm
Removed from the chaos

She breathes slowly
In and out
And closes her eyes
Returning to the battle

The voices have been drowned out
By the stronger physical feelings
The frost begins to recede
And she blinks
Slowly at first, then again
As a single tear
Trickles down her cheek

A voice,
Small and childish
Whispers quietly
You’re going to be okay

She retreats inwardly
Her body now lying still on her bed
As a young girl
With flaming red hair
And freckles
With eyes shining like stars
Catches her
As she collapses to the floor

Small warm hands
Gently cup her face
As tears pour down her cheeks
Before reaching forward
And embracing her
In a warm hug
As the last of the frost
Disappears from her hands