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Cian in Worryland
inspired by wanda coleman
i get scared all the time
a child forever wanting to be held,
running away to safety after the lights have been turned off
i have been known to scare others, too
i make toddlers cry out and call for their mothers
all because i was too afraid of the storm outside
once, when i was 12, i tried to kill myself
because i was too afraid of living
than permanently leaving this earth
how do i tell that 12 year old
that i’ve now become terrified of dying?
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Ever since I was a child, I've always just been the type prone to worrying, prone to being afraid of the world. I find it hard to believe how close I was to leaving it, considering all my fears about the future now. Hopefully that all made sense, I hope you like it and know I love you & am so proud of how far you've come <3
(Inspired by Wanda Coleman's piece "Wanda in Worryland")
TW// Mention of Suicide Attempt