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crushing my fantasy
November 8, 2010
What if you felt really alone
But you never wanted friends?
What if you felt like dying
But it sort of made you live?
Living in a world
With your mind far away
Unwilling to face reality
Until they crush your fantasy
You tried and you tried
To do what was right
But some artists only see black and white.
So now you can bury yourself alive
In the magic they could never find
What if you're happy when you're sad?
What if the little things make you mad?
The discrepancy's in the lining
The over-dramatized designing
Living for a moment
That will never be
Waiting til' heaven
Living in my dreams.
© Kristine B., Setauket, NY
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JOIN THE DISCUSSION
This article has 9 comments.
breeeegreen BRONZE said...
on Nov. 23 2010 at 10:44 pm
i really liked this. i relate and understand this, beautiful poem
ImagineWhatItWouldBeLikeToFly SILVER said...
on Nov. 23 2010 at 10:21 pm
Thanks so much! And thank you for critiquing it, too. When I write, it's usually right before I go to bed or when I'm upset and the words just sort of come out, so whatever I said wasn't planned, it came from my feelings. I appreciate you pointing it out though, because I'd love to improve my writing in any way I can. :)
dancingintheflames GOLD said...
on Nov. 23 2010 at 6:32 pm
That was really great!! i loved reading it:)
wolfpack270 SILVER said...
on Nov. 23 2010 at 4:45 pm
I really liked this poem. It makes you think and even if at first you don't think the poem applies to you I think most people will find that there is some part of this poem that they have thought about at some point. The only thing i didn't like was the ending. The last stanza doesn't seem to fit in my opinion, but its not my writing ^_^
ImagineWhatItWouldBeLikeToFly SILVER said...
on Nov. 23 2010 at 10:26 am
never heard of that :) haha
melissarose BRONZE said...
on Nov. 23 2010 at 9:39 am
hi. so these look like some lyrics from mudvayne.... ?
I_am_the_only_me GOLD said...
on Nov. 23 2010 at 1:12 am
Loved it! :D good job. Keep writing!
16 articles 1 photo 30 comments