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Tears

October 9, 2011
By aislingob BRONZE, St. Louis, Missouri
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aislingob BRONZE, St. Louis, Missouri
2 articles 0 photos 5 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Love as long as you live, and laugh as much as you breathe."

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I could taste them.
I could taste the rage, the agony, the hatred.
I could taste the love of a mother, slowly leaving me…
One small drop at a time.

And it drove me crazy, as I took a step
Cars racing past me, no one would have time to think
Soon
I would be ‘that girl’,
The girl who couldn’t take it
The girl who ended it

But as I began to take the last step
Head pounding now
Mind dull
They stopped me

As much as I wanted to believe that it was over
As much as I wanted to believe that I couldn’t feel,
That I couldn’t live
They proved I could

I was drowning now,
But I managed to escape
The taste of my tears
Bringing me back to reality.

© Mary A., Fullerton, CA

The author's comments:
This piece is a piece based partly on my own emotions, and partly my emotions taken to a whole other level.
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JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 3 comments.

justme242 GOLD said...
on Jul. 16 2012 at 10:18 am
justme242 GOLD, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
10 articles 0 photos 32 comments

Favorite Quote:
help will be given to those who ask for it.

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Great job it was very good 

 

mynameisobel PLATINUM said...
on Jul. 16 2012 at 9:48 am
mynameisobel PLATINUM, Collingswood, New Jersey
27 articles 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
You can not be brave if only good things have happened to you.

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They way you made the reader be able to feel how much pain the character was in was amazing. it was amazing.
DanielM SILVER said...
on Jul. 16 2012 at 9:44 am
DanielM SILVER, Kent, Washington
6 articles 1 photo 245 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;I would rather hated million times for what i did then loved a million times for what i didn&#039;t do.&quot; - Daniel Moto<br /> &quot; I&#039;ve sought out to be the best i could posibly be but when i hit a roadblock in life what did i do, i had two choices either stay at the roadblock or i take this roadblock and make of it and go around it and achieve my goal. So, what will it be?&quot;- Daniel Mathia <br /> <br /> &quot;People take love like its a four letter word or just a phrase that you tell people or your friends all the time. But in reality love is much bigger than a merely phrase or 4 letter word. Instead love is a genuine promise or covenant to that special person.&quot;-Daniel Mathia <br /> <br /> &ldquo;Why change yourself when you were made perfect and wonderfully by the creator of everything?&rdquo; &ndash; Daniel Mathia <br /> <br /> &ldquo;If live is not hurtin then were really not living in.&rdquo; &ndash; B. Reith

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Wow that was really good. I really like your emotions. I especially like the line I tasted my own agony. Very good use of imagery and emotion. Suggestion: I would more imagery .