I have wandered and meandered into the abyss of change
they all say turn back, but what does it matter anyway?
The walls of rock all bend and fold to stop me
if i were to turn around, I'd know things that were good
just can't be.
I am a nuisance to myself more than you can understand
while you can get lost in the sea I am stuck here on dry land
I'm stuck inside my mind and all you have to do is walk away
In this abyss, my body has abandoned me, and on the ground it lays
I see it lying there but it just seems like vacant space
I cannot see you but I hear the sounds your making with your hands
your fingers like spiders legs creating crooked teeth on the baby grand
your soul is in a different place as is mine
but I can see the bits of string and vein that connect you to your bones and spine
I remember once you became disconnected after you saw deaths cold touch
perhaps thats why you never left yourself alone with you, the silence was too much
I met death myself, and he wasn't like they say, he wasn't cloaked in drapes of black
he said I was wrong all along, that life was more forgiving and he said I could turn back
but don't you dare go dig up my grave dear boy, I'm wasting away on the wind
and as it goes I'm finding what was there all along beneath my skin
on a moonstricken path I'm holding hands with death
but darling loosen your grip I want to savor my last breath
He led me to the water that I'd been searching for all this time
fragments of me melted away turning to delicate petals floating in a line
Through the reflection at the waters edge I could barely see your flushed face
the tree of life with its bare limbs extend around you in that faraway place
you beckon me to safety but safety is not freedom and it certainly isn't true
I must not be where I don't belong and you must learn to live with you
I ask how deep the water goes but the sweet song you wrote played over my attempts to stall
I know somewhere you were watching petals weave where there are no flowers from which to fall
my feet lifted up and I took two more steps into the weeping sea
I must protect what is rightfully mine and that means your feelings for me
If I must go, its best I leave before it is too late
before you decided that what you thought was love ended up being hate