I almost enjoy watching the transformation
red anger eyes brighten and tilt it’s amazing how quickly your muscles work
to turn your mouth into an upside down frown
your face lights up like a cheap neon sign
funny how anyone can unlock this stranger but you forgot to give me the key
I know you don’t care that’s not why I asked to go home because I’m sick but not really not physically not what you would call a real excuse and I know you know that
sometimes I wish I could rip your eyes off my face
both of us don’t care so very much that the elephant in the room is dying bleeding from bullet holes fired from our deadly mouths
I try not to see me so you won’t underneath this blanket you’ve covered me in pretending I’m a piece of furniture glueing me to the walls
generic human wallpaper
the way your face twists
when you drink sour milk or eat stale bread
or discover that despite your efforts it is still Monday
how your face looks when you look at me
cracking clay hearts with the heat of your surprise tinted with disgust
and after a few days of procrastination
we duct tape it upright again because of course as everyone knows
duct tape fixes everything
don’t treat me like the brainless melodramatic teenage girl you think I am
I was never dramatic enough
remember when you would sing since I fell for you to stop my crying back when you would fall for me fall on the ground as a horse for a cowgirl to ride carnival rides you waving like you didn’t expect the merry-go-round to turn that one last time back when I was Daddy’s girl singing Daddy’s home because i missed you while you were asleep