Monsters Deep Inside | Teen Ink

Monsters Deep Inside

February 17, 2014
By No_One_Will_Notice SILVER, Westminster, Colorado
No_One_Will_Notice SILVER, Westminster, Colorado
6 articles 0 photos 0 comments

Favorite Quote:
Why do I wear myself down to nothing?<br /> Would you let me widdle myself into something?<br /> Carving me down to the absolute bitterness<br /> Wipe away the jealousy, I got nothing left<br /> I&#039;m chewing on what&#039;s left of my silent tongue<br /> From holding it back. -Botdf


Monsters deep inside,
Wake up when I close my eyes,
Push all the good memories aside,
Makes me think everyone lies,
When I try to drown them,
They learn to how swim,
Makes me want to condemn,
But only makes me feel grim,
Oh how I wish this torture could end,
So I can finally smile,
And maybe find a friend,
So I don’t seem so vile,
Why do these tears still fall?
I thought I had my monsters under control,
They make me feel so small,
And leave me as a empty hole.


The author's comments:
When I wrote this poem i was thinking about my everyday battle with the demons or in this case the "monsters" inside of me.

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on Feb. 20 2014 at 9:13 pm
Opticalillusion DIAMOND, Edenton, North Carolina
64 articles 13 photos 59 comments

Favorite Quote:
I am an artist bound only for the poet&#039;s glory....But only achieve half of the success that my dreams aspire to find, And to what do the whispers tell me of this failure...To what end to they haunt my nightmares...my eternal dark dreams...

Just thought I would comment on the fact, that this is not a sonnet. Too many lines, Sonnets are Fourteen lines long. Yours however consists of sixteen, And on another note, you used the word "Condemn" in a sort of way that makes the work seem a bit quirky and a bit slack. Condemn what? Condemn yourself, other people, your dreams perhaps. Other than those minor flaws, I thought this was an intresting piece, not to mention you have hit a relateable subject (At least with me)  besides the misplace of the one word, you do have a sort of knack for poetic eloquence. So do keep writing sir, you will most defitnably get better with time and practice. I myself still have far to go.