Let’s pretend that things are different . That I am not the sort whose last resort is wishing on eyelashes , the first star of the night or at 11:11 in earnest with my eyes closed. Let’s pretend that things are different , that I’m mature enough to realize that fairytales don’t exist in real life and there are no happy endings.

I ramble on and on. About music , about rain. About anything but why I am here. I know you’re going to hurt me. And it wont take too long. Its all going to be over in the blink of an eye . But why let myself be vulnerable to getting hurt? I choose to put on an unrealistic and unfortunately futile façade . I had you fooled for a while , but little did I know , you’re smarter than that. And now, here we are. Eight months later, when things should have gone my way, here we are. You’re ready to break my heart and I’m pretending I don’t know that. I’ve been up all night , thinking of you , wondering what might possibly be up in your mind. I can’t get it . You begin to speak , telling me where it went wrong. But that’s not what happens in stories. That’s not the way it’s supposed to be. You’re supposed to promise me you’ll be there forever . I’m waiting for a dream to seep through and somehow convince you to change your words. But you don’t stop. The neon lights and headlights from outside seep in, surrounding me. I want you to stop , but you don’t care . And just like that, you leave. It’s over. And I do something that never happens in a fairytale. I cry .