Anxiety is something that comes and goes in waves, but it will never be something I can fully get rid of. Having an anxiety attack is an experience no one wants to go through. I sit in my room with tears running down my face, abnormal breathing, and a sense of panic radiating through me head to toe. My hair is a mess, tiny strands stuck to my face but the millions of emotions built up in me aren’t focused on something that small of an issue. Who knew something so small could trigger something so big? Emotions can build up over time and the slightest spark could start a wildfire within.

Medium-length blonde hair, blue eyes that would sparkle in the sun. I walked, my facial expression was not friendly. My mom says I always look unapproachable but I can’t do anything about my resting facial expression. My face hides the thousands of emotions swarming through my body, my personality does as well. I’m known as the type of person to always think positive and give people a good laugh, but that acted as a way out of the anxiety.

Things as small as walking through the hall can induce great amounts of panic. Wearing a new pair of shoes, the small squeaks make me nervous as my attention shifts from that, to the way I’m walking. All of a sudden an everyday task that seems so simple now has turned impossible. One foot in front of the other I remind myself but it only makes it worse. Soon I feel as if everyone has their eyes on me and the way I’m moving through the halls. While my mind is focused on something so little, my foot decides to skid a little on the beige school floors which makes me suddenly trip. 

As I sit in front of the class for my presentation, the plain white walls stare back at me. Over 30 sets of beady eyes are laid on me as well. The chair I am sitting at shakes while my face hides behind the podium. I can see people whispering, slightly laughing, and messing around and my mind can’t help but wander to the question “are they making fun of me?” Even though the answer is no, I can’t help but think it. Being in the blank abyss of a classroom brings a thousand emotions- panic, nervousness, and fear to name a few. 

Presenting is one of those top anxiety-inducing situations. Knowing that a whole group of people have their attention set on only you adds a great amount of pressure. The moments before stepping up before your peers can surface many emotions, but the minute you steer your focus away from the audience all of that can go away. Sitting behind the podium, I take a deep breath and begin with a shaky voice, as I carry on it gets easier, because even though anxiety is something I carry with me, I also carry courage.