step one

a step into an ocean

a vast unknown world

my future

i stare down

watching the ripples spread

tiny waves

radiating from

me, my future.

i lift my foot

hesitate-

i doubt if it is wise

back i glance

staring past

the road from which i came

my footfalls

a blow with finality

past the puddle now

i stand upon

my new street

and stare up at my house

no, not just a house

a new destiny

change

i look back again,

searching where i came

i find nothing.

i have departed forever, it seems

my gaze returns to the home

new, large it seems

the bricks of my new life

siding yellow

a happy color... right?

no, no, it feels adrift

a floating space away from the world

a new, perilous place

wrapped up in a happy dress

a lie!

a lie of my future,

it should be joy

i step back, with fear,

my foot smashes the small puddle

i retreat from the ocean

staring again, at the ripples.

i step back forward

and take a stone

throwing it down

on the glass surface

watching the way back

fracture, many ripples

flowing from

no more retreat.

i walk forward

brave motion

my hair flowing behind

strands grasping at

yearning for what was

hiding from what is

i ignore it

or try to

as my grasp clutches the handle

fearfully i turn it

watching it slowly move

i pull open my future