erratic midweek spirals and other qualms (revisited) | Teen Ink

erratic midweek spirals and other qualms (revisited)

February 2, 2022
By stinkbuggy BRONZE, Montgomery, Illinois
stinkbuggy BRONZE, Montgomery, Illinois
4 articles 0 photos 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
I'm sure there won't always be sunshine, but there's this momentary beam of light


Mira

Mirame softly

Mirame slowly

Pero mirame

See me and only me 

Take me in and look at me for what I am


I am drooping eye bags that go past the knee & discoloration & forehead pimples & the raw, torn skin surrounding chewed fingernails & clothes worn for a week, rotting teeth, coffee breath, bleeding gums & shaky hands & leg bounces & random twitches & eye strain clawing at the corneas


I am acid reflux & the last piece of food on a plate, left to go cold & the echoing ring of a broken alarm clock & bleach stains & messages left on read & an unskippable ad & the pile of dishes in the sink that no one wants to attend to 


I am roadkill & moldy fruit & brain fog & funny bones & expired milk & cobwebs & dead chrysanthemums 


I am titles of poems I’ll never write & I am too much 


& too little & not enough & overflowing & and I am empty 


I am a mess & I am anything but pleasant  


I am not easy to digest, I am not palatable, I am not something to savor 


Mira  


The author's comments:

In spanish, the word "Mira" means "Look". Though it's a soft introduction to the piece, I wanted to write about feeling uncomfortable and unpleasant in my body. I wanted to put into words how gross and tired I felt in a way that would make sense to people who otherwise wouldn't understand. I wanted people to fully see myself the way I see myself on my bad days. 

I still struggle with negative and intrusive thoughts, but I'm trying and doing my best to get better. I love and am proud of you, have a wonderful day! 


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