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love letter
May 24, 2013
the red flickering flame
of my candle
goes out—
but the silver stars
dappling the moonless night
like sequins on a fish
are my light
tonight
to write you this love letter
© Yoko K., Madison, WI
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JOIN THE DISCUSSION
This article has 12 comments.
writefearless SILVER said...
on Jul. 22 2013 at 12:19 pm
for me a beautiful love letter is the most romantic gift any lover could give. this poem is lovely :)
REALLY?! Thank you. I tried really hard to capture that imagery. Especially that simile. Took a while for me. But definitely worth all the effort. Only writers know the time and effort it takes to perfect one line. While readers are like "Oh yeah, that was nice." ^u^ Thank you, Niquel.
Niquel said...
on Jun. 25 2013 at 11:23 pm
Stars dappling a moonless night like sequins on a fish.... Brilliant. Brilliant simile. That's the most brilliant simile I have ever encountered.
Laugh-it-Out PLATINUM said...
on Jun. 12 2013 at 8:09 pm
Same here, got no love life, haha but thats okay. I mean, don't we all have an imaginary love life. I guess you can have an endless amount of red checks, but please save some for the rest of us. And you're welcome, I will always give you feedback. :)
HAHAHA. You can never have enough red check marks in my opinion. One more is always better. And thanks. I wasn't in love when I wrote this. To be honest, with most of my love poems, they just portray the love of other people, or my imaginary love life. Mine is non-existant really. I just visualized a lover writing his or her love a love letter. And this is what I gave "birth to". Painful process, I'll admit. Though not literal. Thanks, Liv, as always for the feedback. I always appreciate it.
Laugh-it-Out PLATINUM said...
on Jun. 11 2013 at 7:26 pm
Awwww so sweet Mckay! Were you in love when you wrote this??? Haha just teasing. Very beautiful. How's hope and determination. Perfect. I would have given you a check mark but it seems that you have enough of those ;)keep rockin and writin Mckay
SincerelyManon GOLD said...
on May. 30 2013 at 7:00 pm
I love this! It's very mysterious yet gets your point across. It's short, but it definitely tells a strong message:)