Standing in line
And no one knows what's on my mind
No on knows that I am contemplating suicide.
And in this life
We don't know what's around every corner and twist and turn
And we just want to hide
From past regrets and past mistakes
But no one can appreciate
How far we have come in life
And not given into our terrors
And the little thoughts in the back of our mind that is telling us
"Do it, just do it"

I look at my mom
She has had to deal with the loss of her father, brother, a divorce, a son who would rather live with his father than with her.
Also a teenage daughter,
Who fights with her at every twist and turn.
I think to myself
How does she do it?
How does she keep from collapsing
And not bothering to give a s***?

I know that in my mind
I wouldn't have cared
I wouldn't have gotten back up
When I was so beaten down
Because I know that if I can't live through this
Then I sure as h*** couldn't have lived through that.

I think back
In a time when I was little and innocent
And my only worries was if
Little Bear was on tv
But I know that isn't real life
And around every twist and turn
Is someone yelling that you are going to be a failure or you are not good enough.
But the only person yelling, is me,
At myself.
About how I will never be good enough or smart enough
As the rest of the other kids.

But I stop,
And think back,
On my music,
And my friend who can't get that one line out of her head
And sings it over and over and over again.
I know that I will never be the smartest or the fastest
But I sure as h*** can write some d*** good songs