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Small One
I was always one
To hold on too tightly,
To clench my fists
And clutch the words that never
Wanted to stay.
That might have been
Why I was so quiet
And why I was so scared of gentle voices
That coaxed my own.
I was a child
Among children
Whose voices were too big for their entire bodies,
While my quiet words
Barely even filled my mouth.
They all told me
That I should speak up,
But I was too small
And too free
To listen to what they said.
If someone had told me
Small one, stay free
I might have remembered
To never grow too big.
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I was a quiet kid in more ways than one and in some ways, that hasn't changed. I wasn't just quiet in what I said to other people, though. I had quiet thoughts. I had a quiet personality. Now, I feel like I've turned into this volatile human being who could break at any minute. I miss being the quiet kid- the calm one, a little bit smaller and more invisible than everyone else.