Fallin' | Teen Ink

Fallin'

November 23, 2009
By XOXOhaloXOXO GOLD, Ellsworth, Maine
XOXOhaloXOXO GOLD, Ellsworth, Maine
13 articles 1 photo 63 comments

Favorite Quote:
I'm the author of my life and, unfortunately, I'm writing in pen=]


thump, thump, thump.
my heart beats so fast.
thump, thump, thump.
ur driving me wild.
thump, thump, thump.
why r u so perfect?
thump, thump, thump.
i love it when u smile.
thump, thump, thump.
wish u knew who i was.
thump, thump, thump.
wish i wasnt so invisible.
thump, thump, thump.
boy, im fallin’ 4 u.
thump, thump, thump.
wake up and see.
thump, thump, thump.
ur the one 4 me.
thump, thump, thump.
and im the one 4 u.
thump, thump, thump.
hold me in ur arms.
thump, thump, thump.
tell me im perfect.
thump, thump, thump.
please do it 4 me.
thump, thump, thump.
make my day!
thump, thump, thump.
maybe after u do,
thump, thump, thump.
the fallin’ will go away.


The author's comments:
I got inspired for this from a girl's feelings when they have a really big crush on a guy, but he doesn't seem to ever notice her or take interest in her. These are just some thing that fly through my mind when these crushes occur.

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This article has 5 comments.


on Jan. 3 2010 at 7:32 pm
XOXOhaloXOXO GOLD, Ellsworth, Maine
13 articles 1 photo 63 comments

Favorite Quote:
I'm the author of my life and, unfortunately, I'm writing in pen=]

my destroy me poem was published. i think u'll like this one better!

on Dec. 15 2009 at 8:46 pm
XOXOhaloXOXO GOLD, Ellsworth, Maine
13 articles 1 photo 63 comments

Favorite Quote:
I'm the author of my life and, unfortunately, I'm writing in pen=]

when the destroy me! poem i wrote gets published, ill let you know. it doesn't have a name on it but it is mine.

on Dec. 10 2009 at 6:48 am
XOXOhaloXOXO GOLD, Ellsworth, Maine
13 articles 1 photo 63 comments

Favorite Quote:
I'm the author of my life and, unfortunately, I'm writing in pen=]

Thanks for the advice...like I said, I wasn't really a fan if this poem so I'll try to fix it up...I have some better ones pending approval right now...I'll let you know when they make it on the site(I really like these ones).

on Dec. 10 2009 at 5:53 am
---Sixx--- PLATINUM, /, Other
26 articles 4 photos 12 comments

Favorite Quote:
\"To see what a man is like, take a look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals.\"

The idea for this was good. My suggestions are:

-Despite the fact that the "thump thump thump" was a good factor, I found it a little too repetetive.

-Try to elaborate more on the girl's feeling; there was more description in the quotations bar than in the poem.

Keep working!

on Dec. 9 2009 at 6:51 pm
XOXOhaloXOXO GOLD, Ellsworth, Maine
13 articles 1 photo 63 comments

Favorite Quote:
I'm the author of my life and, unfortunately, I'm writing in pen=]

I hope u enjoy this poem. It's not my best, so feel free to criticize. Thanks!